hwango: (hermit crab)
[personal profile] hwango

I don’t understand what people think is so scary about the dark. I mean, sure, it’s full of horrifying monsters and you can’t see where they are and at any moment something could come skittering out of the shadows and drag you screaming to your doom. Wait…I think I just figured out what’s scary about that.

But if you’re like me, you still prefer the dark. Out in the light people can see you, and if you’re like me, you hate that. When people are looking at you it’s like their eyes are crawling all over you like thousands of tiny invisible insects. If you're like me, you don't like things crawling on you. When the lights are on you just want to run away and be alone and maybe hide in a closet. Preferably you’d hide in the closet of a small child you can devour later when no one is watching, but at that moment any closet will do. I mean, eventually you'll have to find one with a sleeping child outside of it, but there's no rush. Except that you haven't eaten one in days, and you're starving.

You sound kind of creepy, actually. I thought we had a lot in common, what with our shared fear of people looking at us and dislike for being covered in crawling things, but now I’m starting to think you might be the boogeyman. I feel like I should go hide from you now. But, you know, not in a closet, because that's a terrible place to hide from the boogeyman.

Instead, I think I'll go back to my usual hiding place, under your bed.

Sleep well.
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